


( better be without sense than misapply it as you do )

by Dearemma



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: "I wish to god I had never met her.", Anyways, F/M, READ THE TAGS BECAUSE I AM ABOUT TO RAMBLE HERE, UPDATE: MAGGIE GREY IS NOW ADDRESSED, also nick marsh is here becausei am trash, also technically maggie is maggie grey, but i never really address it in the fic, but there is a draft where its meredith and addison but i'm a coward and didn't go through with it, canon? like, chapter 2 is fun, enjoy, i got to add my fav line from the 2009 mini series, is a mood, it exists but i just put the characters i wanted in the fic and mixed and matched?, jackson is a mess and that's pretty much all you need to know, meredith/jackson are my brotp and they both love maggie a lot, so random things, which honestly, writer has a weird obsession with nick marsh and it shows
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-09-10
Packaged: 2020-01-15 15:03:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18501433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dearemma/pseuds/Dearemma
Summary: Raising an eyebrow, Jackson expected her to take the the next logical leap in that reasoning and agree with him but she seemed too distracted observing the new shiny thing she had created to realize she had nothing at all to do with its inception. “You had nothing to do with this.” he repeated waving a finger at her.“Shoosh, of course I did. I think it’s my new talent, like that patient Dr. Webber had a few months ago, Cece? She was a matchmaker, I think I can be one too! I’m good at this, like, I may be really good at this.” she was a genius, she could do anything she set her mind to. “I should set more people up. Do you think Bailey is dating after her divorce? She deserves love, everyone deserves love.”Jane Austen meets Greys Anatomy, also known as, Maggie has too much time in her hands.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> please read the tags on the work because that's where i ramble. Also, there will be a second part!!

“Stop it.” Leaning against the counter besides her, Jackson shot her a reproachful look, though his lips twitched, threatening to break into a smile at any second. It was hard not to smile when she was beaming like a child on Halloween. Still, he wouldn’t be doing his job as her best and oldest friend if he didn’t judge her just a little bit (read: a lot).

“I’m not doing anything!” Maggie exclaimed flustered at being caught spying on Meredith, grabbing his hand to tug him away to a nearby corridor, not wanting her sister to turn around and see her lurking. “It was the  _ sisterly  _ thing to do Jackson. I couldn’t let it go on! Mer had been moping ever since Derek got back together with Addison, and Dr. Marsh spent the last ten years raising his niece. He was clueless! He had no idea how to pick up a girl anymore. I was doing everyone a favor by setting them up, I mean, look at them.”

Peeking his head into the corridor, Jackson hated to admit it, but Maggie was right -- Meredith, even though she was trying very hard to hide it, was radiant as she chatted with the transplant surgeon, who seemed equally besotted with her. Jackson felt protective over her, they had known each other basically all their lives, met in middle school after Meredith transferred to his school in Boston and their similar backgrounds kept them in each other’s orbits all their lives (even during Meredith’s pink hair faze which he still swears gives him nightmares). 

He would describe her as his best friend, if her little sister hadn’t stolen that title when she joined them at Dartmouth. They were still undergrads and Maggie was the bright medical student the medical school had stolen from Yale by offering her everything her little heart could desire. Until then, he hadn’t really payed attention to her, she was Meredith’s genius little sister who spoke too fast and constantly said the wrong thing when she was nervous, and suddenly she was everywhere, sharing an apartment with Meredith, going to parties with them, prattling on about the new Star Trek season and before he realized, he was dropping by the apartment to see her and not her older sister (who complained for 2.5 seconds that she was being abandoned until she realized now people would stop assuming she and Jackson were a thing and start hitting on her).

And since they are best friends, he feels like it’s his sacred duty to guide her in the right direction when she is wrong. And right now, she is very very wrong. 

“They do look happy,” he admitted when she tugged him back, whispering that he was being too obvious and they were going to notice him, “but you didn’t set them up, you had nothing to do with them getting together. Mer told me she thought he was hot and funny months ago, and didn’t he ask Dr. Bailey if she was single a few weeks ago?”

“He did! That’s when I got the idea. Well, not at that moment, I was too busy laughing at the way he ran away when she glared at him, but it’s when I realized that they would be perfect for each other.” he has heard this story from ten different people, with wildly different details and embellishments, but the consistent parts are: Marsh asked Bailey if Meredith was single, Bailey glared at him until he started to blabber (a common side-effect to the Bailey patented glare) and then she ranted for two minutes about attendings who can’t keep it in their pants and how they won’t leave her intern alone, and something nerdy that Maggie explained to him was from an episode of Star Trek that involve pheromones. 

Raising an eyebrow, Jackson expected her to take the the next logical leap in that reasoning and agree with him but she seemed too distracted observing the new shiny thing she had created to realize she had nothing at all to do with its inception. “You had nothing to do with this.” he repeated waving a finger at her.

“Shoosh, of course I did. I think it’s my new talent, like that patient Dr. Webber had a few months ago, Cece? She was a matchmaker, I think I can be one too! I’m good at this, like, I may be really good at this.” she was a genius, she could do anything she set her mind to. “I should set more people up. Do you think Bailey is dating after her divorce? She deserves love, everyone deserves love.”

“Do those still exist? Thought Tinder would have…” shaking his head, he leaned against the wall, rubbing his temple. “Maggie! Seriously, you are not a matchmaker.. Don’t you walk away from me!” before he could start telling her all of the reasons why she was wrong, she started walking away from him (it was a pretty good list, and he loved it when she got angry with him, the way her eyes cross).

Peeling himself from the wall, it took him two quick steps he caught up with her, delighting in her frustrated huff. “Sorry couldn’t hear you from up here, what did you say?” he teased, sidestepping as she tried to shove him, “Look, Meredith and Marsh already liked each other, they are both single, they are attractive. Yeah, he is an attending and I had hoped she had learned her lesson with Shepherd but I don’t think Marsh also has a secret wife.”

“But they never would have gotten together if I didn’t push them in the right direction. I mentioned we had a problem in our pipes the other day and that we needed help fixing them.  Which reminds me, Marsh is a terrible plumber and we still need help with our pipes, but volunteered immediately and when he stopped by and all he did was gaze at Meredith and eat our food.  _ And, _ I abandoned Meredith three times this week at Joe’s when he was there. It might have moved along faster if Cristina didn’t show up the first two times to rant about her problems, but they kissed yesterday and now I think they are officially together. Thanks to  _ me _ .”

Smiling victoriously, Maggie opened grabbed a few charts from the nurse’s station and before Jackson had the time to open his mouth and argue some more, she shoved three charts into his chest. “Room 3456 needs a dressing change, room 4632 and room 1564 both need a central line and room 3578 needs a rectal exam.”

He looked at the charts and then back at her. “This conversation is not over.” he threatened, repeating the room numbers in his mind over and over, “you are wrong and I’ll get you to admit it.”

Waving him off, she ignored his threats and basked in the power of being chief resident and of a job well done. Her sister was happy, Dr. Riggs already offered her a fellowship at the hospital in Cardio after she passed her boards and there was nothing Jackson could say or do to change her mind.

Now, who would be next?

Which person at this hospital would benefit from her new found powers?

At lunch, Jackson sat down in one of the gurneys in the tunnels next to Cristina, slapping her hand away when she tried to steal one of his fries. They were the only ones there, Meredith was enjoying her new relationship with Marsh, something he did not want to think about. April was probably shadowing a resident, taking compulsive notes in that little notebook of hers, and Alex… 

“Where is Karev?” he asked, reading over her shoulder, unsurprised to see a medical journal propped open on her lap. “Thought you guys were on the same service today. I’m stuck with Altman who thinks I’m just a pretty boy with nothing to contribute.”

“You are just a pretty boy with nothing to contribute,” she replied instantly, her eyes never leaving the page. “And don’t complain, I’d kill to be in the cardio today, I’d kill to be in cardio for just one hour. I am on babysitting duty today, and if that wasn’t bad enough, Robbins is a lunatic. She smiles at everyone and keeps acting like I am the worst intern she ever came across. I am the best intern she ever met! I am the best intern this hospital has ever had but instead of using me and my brilliance--” the intern ranted, finally turning around to face Jackson, her long black hair bouncing as she talked “-- I’m stuck running labs and doing charts.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” he remarked, simply nodding at her other statements, knowing better than to argue with Yang, “what happened to Karev?”

“Why? Are you missing your boyfriend?” 

“You know, this is why no one likes you.” he said slapping her hand again, making a tsking noise with his tongue. “All you gotta do is say please.”

“I don’t wanna be liked. I wanna be feared, I wanna be revered and worshipped. Interns, residents, attendings, they will scatter when they see me.”

Cocking his head to the side, he waited for her to answer his question.

“Fine, your boyfriend is in surgery with Robbins.” she said turning the page of the journal with a little more force than necessary.

Grinning, Jackson snapped his fingers, biting his lower lip to keep himself from laughing, blue eyes twinkling with myrrh -- he is not going to let her live this down anytime soon.  “So that’s why you are even more angry than normal today. Robbins choose Karev over you to scrub in. That makes sense.”

And just like he expected, that got a huge rise out of Cristina, who instantly closed the journal with a bang, opening her mouth to yell at him, but seeing his laughing face, decided to hit him with the journal instead. “Ow. Ow, what was that for?” he asked rubbing his shoulder, despite the pain, his lips were still quirked in a smile. 

“Ugh, I’m over this. I’m going to go to the E.R. and if I’m lucky, someone somewhere crashed their car and there will be an amazing surgery for me to scrub in. Laters.” leaving her mess still in the gurney, Cristina sauntered off, yelling at him to leave the journal at her locker later because she hadn’t finished reading the article on bypass surgery.

Sighing, he cleaned the mess and finished eating his lunch. 

He needs new friends.

Preferably ones who don’t make his head hurt.

 

The new intern batch was good -- Jackson and Meredith were naturally brilliant and hard workers; Cristina Yang was nothing short of genius and spent more hours in the hospital than the rest combined; Alex Karev… as his chief resident, Maggie knows the attendings agree there is some untapped potential there, but that they also agree that it seems like it’s buried pretty deep. And then there is April, quiet, awkward, kind, pays attention to every detail, but misses the big picture April Kepner whose head seems to be constantly buried in that little notebook of hers. Maggie wants to grab it, throw it in the distance and throw April to the lions. She knows the girl can do better and help with the patients more, but she seems stuck with this coping method. 

Also, if the rumor mill is to be believed, she hasn’t dated or slept with anyone since her intern year began.  Which is just, not healthy.

Observing the intern from afar, Maggie cocks her head to the side, looking her up and down. She is going to help her regardless, it’s part of her job, but there is a difference between offering advice and showing the girl the ropes, and giving her the Maggie All Inclusive Treatment (newly coined term, it’s going to be what she calls her matchmaking skills). 

April is walking backwards, taking notes, her head in the clouds (or, more likely, in the exams Dr. Altman had requested), so she didn’t realize there was a paramedic heading in the same direction às she did. Grimacing, Maggie looked away as they crashed, biting her lip to stop herself from laughing. Oh, April definetly needs her help, the sooner the better.

“Oops, sorry! Didn’t see you there!” the loud chirp is accompanied by a soft it’s okay from a paramedic, and just a few seconds later, a crash as April stumbles into a shelf.  _ Poor girl,  _ blushing like that over a paramedic? And what even if she doing with her hands? She is like a little lost lamb, begging for help, desiring guidance, a rose almost ready to bloom, and she will do it.

After Matthew leaves (and god, did he find reasons to linger, always looking at April like she is the shiniest toy in the room), Maggie walks over to her, smiling excitedly.

“Kepner! I’ve got a case and I could use an intern, why don’t you join me? I haven’t seen you working in cardio a lot lately, Dr. Riggs mentioned liking your work a few months ago but nothing since. Don’t tell me you think our field is boring?”

“No! No! Absolutely not! I find it fascinating, I love it. I’ve just been, you know, a little lost. I was really into Neuro but then Dr. Shepherd left, and I was a little lost I guess, disappointed really. I started working more in the ER and I actually really like how things work down here you know? and --” April babbled, growing a little more excited at the end, eager to talk about how she loved the busy schedule of the ER and all of the people she could help.

“Well, as fun as the ER is, you are a surgical intern and you need to focus on doing more operations. You have 20 less hours than the rest of your year.” she remarked, interrupting April. Seeing the intern’s face fall, Maggie put an arm around the taller girl her and started guiding her to the surgical wing, “but it’s not too late to change that. Today you are with me, and I arranged your schedule for the next of the week to be very busy with surgeries. We will get you caught up in no time! Yang is going to be very jealous of you.” she added in the end with a laugh, grinning brighter when April joined her. “Cardio with me today, Cardio with Riggs for the next two days, the day after that you will be assisting Dr. Koracick whose schedule is packed with procedures, so make sure to read up on all of them. Think you can handle it?”

This was the moment, while she had decided she wanted to help April, her assistance will be useless if April doesn’t want to improve herself as well. This is a busy schedule, but nothing the other interns (even Karev) wouldn’t be able to handle, but it will be different from April’s endless days handling trauma in the ER.

She notes with pleasure that April squares her shoulders before replying, her chin raising as she says, a resounding  _ yes. _

Let operation “Make April Kepner a brilliant surgeon and the girlfriend of someone who matches and appreciates her brilliance” begin!

 

Most people did not notice the change, Maggie was known for her dedication so her extra attention to one specific intern didn’t raise any eyebrows. And the people who did notice, well, they were happy to see April getting out of her shell, speaking up, actively participating in surgeries instead of just watching from the wall of the O.R. The effect was positive and almost instantaneous (to the outside eye, in reality Maggie was working all hours to put her plan into effect). The only two people who were unhappy with the change were Jackson and Meredith, who could see all of the negative effects people were overlooking.

For one, April hanged on to every word Maggie said, which was a tremendous ego boost to the woman who knows she is already smarter than all those around her; and speaking of being smarter, April is now measuring herself up against Maggie, which no one should ever do, it’s unhealthy and impossible to try and keep up with her.

And, it was distracting Maggie from more important things (read: her sister and best friend).

If Maggie isn’t in surgery or sleeping, she is talking to April, shoving medical journals at her, talking about her wardrobe and what she could change to spice things up (somehow Maggie learned that April is the only non-redhead of her family and wants to change that). 

April is slowly turning into little Maggie.

“I bet that in two weeks Kepner is going to faint with exhaustion and Maggie will be so disappointed that she will forget this whole thing and go back to her normal self” Meredith remarked, stealing a fry from Jackson’s plate. This act would usually result in him slapping her hand away and pulling the plate closer to himself, but he is so distracted by watching Maggie teach April how to do a special suture on a banana that she steals almost half of his plate. 

“I don’t know, Kepner seems to be handling it better than I thought she would be. Riggs requested her to be put in his service again, and I saw your frown when Koracick complimented her.” it had pissed her off, she has been trying to get on Koracick’s good graces for months now, hoping to get more neuro surgeries but the man only seemed interested in making remarks about her relationship with Derek and coffee runs. Frowning, she steals another fry, leaning back against the crappy cafeteria table, her eyes joining his in spying Maggie and April. 

“I was tired.” Nick had gotten an earful last night after she came home, it was his fault she was tired, consequently it was his fault she was too slow in answering his question about an obscure treatment she knew about (it was her neuro journals that Maggie kept giving April!). “This is driving me crazy, yesterday I came home and they were discussing a cardio procedure and choosing a hair dye to apply to Kepner’s hair.” a trace of jealousy twisted her voice, it wasn’t just the procedure she was upset about, Maggie was now too busy to spend time with her. 

Jackson can relate to that, it’s been weeks since Maggie stopped by his place just to chat. Weeks since they cooked a meal together. She was so busy trying to make Kepner a mini-white version of herself that she forgot her old friends. “Do you think we can steal Kepner back? Distract her with intern stuff?”

“Nah, me and Cristina tried that yesterday, she is not happy about this at all. But before we could finish our offer she was running back to Maggie.”

“We have to find a way to break that up, it’s not good for either of them and I think April is going to get hurt.” everyone in the intern group had a soft spot for April (even if they tried to deny it by grunting and looking away), and while Meredith and Jackson were close, the intern group slowly divided into two subcategories -- Meredith, Cristina and Alex versus Jackson and April, so he felt responsible for her. 

“Hurt? I think you are being a little over dramatic now Jackson.”   

“I don’t think I am,” shaking his head, he finally tore his gaze away from the table and turned to Meredith, “two weeks ago April was excitedly telling me about her date plans with Matthew. Yesterday I asked her about it and she said she forgot and accidentally stood him up. I saw him today, he looked dejected and she seemed like she wanted to talk to him but Maggie walked in the other direction and she followed her. Look, I’m sure Maggie has good intentions, but what is good for Maggie, might not be good for April and she is going to get hurt.”

She hadn’t really thought about it like that, a part of her wanted to defend Maggie, just because she was her little sister and she didn’t to hear negative things about her, but this was Jackson, the only person who loved Maggie as much as she did (and sometimes, she thought, when their gazes lingered too long, that maybe their feelings weren’t as platonic as they insisted they were), if he was worried that Maggie was doing something like this, than maybe she should have a talk with her.

“You are right. They want completely different things, I mean, April is still a virgin, and Maggie is definetly not.” she said shuddering, as Jackson groaned. 

“I didn’t need to hear that.” 

“And I didn’t need to hear her and…” 

“-Shut up! Shut up! Don’t finish that sentence.” chucking a napkin at her mouth, Jackson glared at her until she shut up.  _ Interesting,  _ he didn’t used to react like that. He would groan, playfully cover his ears with his hands, but this was new. Things had changed ever since they reunited in Seattle,maybe she had underestimated how much. 

Her pager beeped before she could probe further into the matter. 

“It’s Koracick, I better get there before Kepner does. I’ll talk to Maggie about this after our shift. If she is even home.” waving Jackson off, Meredith takes another look at the table with her sister and her new pet project, her lips curling in distaste. Maggie is playing with April’s hair and showing her a picture on her phone, apparently they are still talking about making April a redhead which is just ridiculous, and it especially annoys Meredith because the last redhead that walked these halls was Addison and, well, that’s a can of worms she still hasn’t fully dealt with.

Feeling an arm wrap around her waist, Meredith grins and looks up at Nick, tilting her head up for a kiss almost automatically. Walking backwards, they kiss for a few seconds in a corner away from prying eyes, grinning into each other’s months. The relationship is brand new, she expected more awkwardness and ignoring each other at work, but his slow pursuit of her meant that she has gotten used to his presence, craves it even. Before he can deepen the kiss and distract her, she pulls away, her hands curled against his dark scrub top. 

“Gotta run, I need to impress Koracick and get there before Kepner does.”

“I think Kepner passed by us a minute ago.” he said letting go of her waist, barely flinching when she slapped his chest.

“No more kissing! Ever! Shit!” 

  
  


Maggie doesn’t get crushes, not anymore. After the embarrassment of crushing on so many guys who thought she was just a kid during med school, Maggie made the choice to stop getting crushes. And most of the time, she can force herself to forget dazzling smiles and pretty blue eyes, she has control over her emotions, thank you very much. She once got a crush when she was fourteen and denied its existence and to this day she is still denying it. She is a strong, independent, brilliant, masterful -- the eyes are not just pretty, they are blue and he has an accent and she is only human.

So, when Dr. Riggs, Nathan, casually mentioned that during his residency there were so many parties and he thinks it’s weird how “well-behaved” the hospital is, well, she has no option but to throw a rocking party to impress him? He is her boss. It’s her job to impress him. And he had looked so happy when she mentioned she might be throwing a party soon, she had been hoping for a positive reaction, but it shocked her how quickly he agreed to come and how he offered to bring her anything she needed. 

_ I mean, I have a crush on him and everything, but I was not expecting that much? It’s kinda weird, do I even like him as much as he likes me? Oh god, this is going to be a problem. _

It was a jocks only party -- surgeons only. Originally she wanted to invite some of the firefighters as well, Andy, Vic, Dean are amazing and it’s been a while since she had to the chance to hang with them, but if she invited the firefighters, the paramedics might decide to join as well. And while there is nothing wrong with the paramedics, it’s just she wants to keep April away from Matthew, who is a sweet dear boy and does a great job, but he brings nothing to the table. He is too similar to the world April already knows, too safe, too boring, he won’t challenge her in anyway that matters, they will just have five generic kids that she will never be able to tell apart, a picket fence and a strange devotion to a man in the sky. Her party on the other hand, will be filled with amazing surgeons that will expand April’s horizons, rock her world!

Hearing a car stop on the driveway, she jumped and opened the door, smiling brightly at Nick and Meredith and their one thousand shopping bags.

“Is this much tequila necessary?” he asked with a groan, carrying his bags to the kitchen.

“It’s not enough.” Meredith chirps, dropping the bags in the couch and arranging the bottles on the table. “You’ve seen me drinking Marsh, this table is just for me, the rest of the party can drink what you got.”

Their mom’s Seattle house had been empty for two decades when Maggie moved in, she decorated a little bit during the years she lived alone, but it was only after Meredith moved in that the house started getting more of a homey-feel. Not because Meredith has any particular decorating skills (if it was up to her, she would have probably left the house in boxes) but because they started spending more time in the house. The two of them at first, Jackson quickly joined them and then the rest of their intern group started showing up. Before that, the only visitors were her one night stands and Amelia and Callie. 

“The house looks good right?” arranging a pillow for the fifth time, Maggie worried her bottom  lip, “I think it looks good. It looks clean, and homey and it doesn’t look like a dump, because seven months ago it looked like a dump, but now it looks like a housey-house. Like, two functioning human beings live here and they they are fun and sexy.” luckily for Meredith and Nick, Maggie started talking again, saving them from having to reply to all of that.

“Okay, so, drinks are settled and Nick, you gotta promise me you won’t let Meredith get wasted tonight, I’m not going to clean up this place by myself, _again._ ” technically he was her superior, but her imitation of the Bailey glare had him nodding yes before she finished speaking. “I got food in the kitchen and April is bringing the rest, she made pizza rolls and brownies!” Maggie turned around to inspect the staircase, missing Meredith mocking April behind her back. 

“Stop it.” Nick whispered pulling Meredith into the kitchen, “you guys just started talking again and while I loved having you in my apartment this past week, you were all mopey.” 

The conversation between them had not gone well, Maggie had accused Meredith of not believing in her, that she thought wasn’t capable of helping anyone because she couldn’t even help herself, that Meredith still saw her as a lost little kid with no friends who needed her big sister to protect her. And while part of that was true, Meredith still saw her as the little kid who used to follow her around the house sometimes, it wasn’t why she tried to talk Maggie out of this ridiculous plan to mold April into her image; this friendship was already having bad side effects -- April got cocky the other day in the O.R. while assisting Dr. Bailey, threw a stitch she shouldn’t have and the patient almost bled out.

“I wasn’t mopey. And I was right, she has gotten só used to April saying yes to everything she suggests, that she can’t heard the word no anymore!”

“Yes, you were.” cupping her chin, he smiled softly at her, eyes crinkling in the corner. “Now come on, let me get all of this beer in the freezer before Maggie decided to send me on another shopping run, my back can’t handle it.”

“Alright, old man.”

 

The party was in full swing two hours later, interns, residents and a few more adventurous attendings danced to the perfectly curated playlist that Maggie had spent hours working on. Alcohol was flowing, snacks were being eaten and April was standing in the corner, nursing the same bottle of beer she had been drinking half an hour ago when she had last seen her. She was smiling, waving at people and, Maggie noted, bopped her head out of rhythm to the song.

Maggie and Jackson were in the kitchen, refilling the snack plates and cleaning things up.

“You tried to seduce her?” passing him another plate to clean, Maggie shakes her head in shock. “You tried to seduce my boss.” 

“Not seduce her, not exactly… More like, impress her?”

“With your flirting skills?” 

“No! With my surgical skills, which she has been ignoring. I thought that maybe, if I flirted with her, she would put her in her next surgery and I could impress her then.” he explained, grimacing as he spoke.

“Yeah, and you tell me my plans are bad.” she says bumping their hips together. “I can’t believe you tried to seduce Dr. Altman for a surgery, I expected better from you Avery.”

Looking down at her, Jackson smiled, grabbing the last dirty plate from her and proceeded to clean it up. “Do you want me to take out the trash?”

Closing the sink, Maggie took the plate away from his hands and finished cleaning it, drying it before he had a chance to protest. “It’s a party Jackson, go have fun.” 

“I am having fun, I’m with you aren’t it?” grabbing a towel, he wiped his hands but made no move to walk away. It was nice to spend time with her, it’s been too long since he has been able to steal a few moments with her, just the two of them. “Besides, you won’t wanna clean this place tomorrow morning. You’ll be too hungover.” 

“I won’t,” she protested weakly, knowing he was probably right. She would stay sober until just a few moments before the party ended and then get ridiculously and gloriously drunk. 

“You will.”

“I won’t.”

“You will!”

“Okay, I will. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go out there and have some fun Jackson.”

He frowned, unhappy her insistence that he leave. “I mean, if you are sure…” 

Nodding, she pushed him out of the kitchen, insisting that she was about to leave as well and he shouldn’t spend his time only with her (even if she had been enjoying herself more cleaning dirty dishes than actually partying).

Staring after him, Maggie considers pulling him back, closing the kitchen’s door and stealing a few more moments before she has to go back, but April appears and pulls her to the middle of the action, babbling on about an unexpected nurse and attending hook up.

“Cool party,” appearing suddenly at her side, Riggs throws an arm around her shoulders, smiling crookedly at her “this is what I am talking about! This is a party.” Flinching, Maggie stepped away from his embrace, happy that he seemed to be enjoying herself, but feeling oddly calm about it. She had been looking forward to seeing his face, to seeing him enjoy himself, but now that he was here, she realized the crush she had do desperately tried to crush before was smaller than she realized. Sure, he was cute, and they got along, but maybe -- and he was talking, he was talking and she should definetly pay attention to that,  _ he has a what _ ?

“Your _ fiance  _ is deployed?” she asked frowning, trying to rewind the conversation and fill in the gaps.

“For three more months. It’s her last tour, we plan on getting married in a few months. Adopt a dog, maybe buy a house by the marina? Always wanted to live by the ocean.” he looked so happy, his eyes shining with love as he spoke about her fiance, whispering her name like it was a precious jewel, “Megan was supposed to be done a year ago, but her stupid brother decided to take on another tour so she joined him. I came early, to you know, get our life started.”

“You don’t go out much do you?” she asked, her mouth moving faster than her brain. Brown eyes widened with shock when she realized how blunt her question was, but he took it in stride, laughing and nodding. 

“Yeah, still making friends.”

“And that’s why you were so excited for a party.” the dots were finally being connected and she couldn’t be happier about the image they formed.

“I think I may have overreacted.”

“You did, a bit.” laughing, she rested a hand on his shoulder, feeling finally relaxed around him. He was a good guy, and she always wanted new friends. “Tell me about Megan, how did you convince her to marry you?”

“Now, that’s a story…”

 

On the other side of the room, Jackson took a long sip of his beer and glowered at Riggs. 

Riggs, who had been making Maggie laugh for the last hour, who apparently knew card tricks and was entertaining people with them. Riggs, whose hand was currently on Maggie’s lower back. 

Riggs, another person who Maggie now preferred to spend her time with. Did she push him out of the kitchen so she could leave and spend time with him? He missed her, more and more each day, he was so used to seeing her everywhere that her absence is an ache inside of him. No more spontaneous visits to his apartment, no more inviting him over for dinner (read: invite him over to cook) on a whim, she was too busy with her new friends. He wants not to be jealous, to be happy for her, the party is a success and she is thriving, but he misses the time when a party would include her standing by his side most of the night; they would tease their friends, dance together, make sure Meredith didn’t drink herself to death and clean up after, all the while enjoying each other’s company. 

On the edge of the group, like always, is April. Maggie keeps inviting her over but she fails time and time again to incorporate into the group, a pesky nurse keeps elbowing her out. The first time it makes him laugh, the second it makes him frown, the third he is setting his beer down and inviting April to dance with him.

Spinning her around the room, he smiles as she starts laughing and jumping up and down. She is incredibly off rhythm but she doesn’t seem to mind, the tears that had been filling her eyes roll out at once, her green eyes shining now with happiness. 

Looking over April’s head, he sees Maggie looking directly at him and April, beaming and mouthing thank you. Shrugging his shoulders, he looks down for a second and then meets her eyes again. 

Jackson is momentarily stunned by how beautiful she looks, how the light of the candles reflects in her eyes, makes her brown skin shine. How did he never realize his best friend is the most beautiful creature in the room?

The feeling that’s been gnawing him from inside, ever since she started pulling away suddenly seems so clear to him he feels like a good for not realizing it sooner.

Riggs leans closer to whisper something in her ear, breaking their connection, leaving him bereft, craving for another second of her warm brown eyes on him. 

Of course he has been missing her, he is in love with her and she is (probably) with someone else.

 

After Rose, the nurse that she definetly did not invite, is rude to April for the third time, Maggie is more than ready to fight for her friend. April looks so small and sad, and no one is doing anything even though she has been trying to drift their attention over to her this whole time. She looks so pretty! The red hair was definetly the right choice, it makes her complexion smoother and brings out the green in her eyes.

But, she doesn’t need to, Jackson comes in like the knight in armour that he can be starts dancing with April.

She watches them dance, well, mostly she watches Jackson dance, completely ignoring the conversation she was having with a neuro fellow and Riggs. It’s been too long since she has had the chance to properly talk to him, these days all they do is steal a few moments, catch up quickly and go on their separate ways. 

When he meets her eyes, she mouths thank you. No one in the circle had done anything for April, no matter how much she urged, but Jackson from the other side of the party had noticed something was wrong and stepped in. He was something else.

She kept watching him, smiling until Riggs whispered he was leaving so he could skype his fiancee. Walking him to the door, she waits until his car rounds the corner before rejoining the party.

Closing the door behind her, Maggie grins as she sees a familiar shape in the entrance hall waiting for her.

“Got tired of dancing?”

“Just wanted a different partner.” grabbing his hand, Maggie drags Jackson to the dancefloor.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seldom, very seldom, does complete truth belong to any human disclosure; seldom can it happen that something is not a little disguised or a little mistaken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i said it was going to be a 2 parter. i am as surprised by this development as you are. now, the second part is here, filled with jaggie goodness. i am 100% sure this is going to only have one more chapter, but hey, i did think this was going to be a one shot so it's clear i have no idea what i'm talking about.  
> random notes: i now actually address the fact maggie is maggie grey, i did not think i would. amelia is here, idk how she fits in, but i love lady chief trifecta so... she is added, it's that simple.  
> cristina yang is perfect and everyone should listen to her.

Putting his hands on her hips, Jackson smiled down at his best friend, enjoying the party for the first time since she pushed him out of the kitchen. His thoughts were a mess, feelings he had been repressing for ages were running through his body, making him pull her closer one second, and step away the next.

Her curls bounced as she danced, covering her eyes from his sight, but every few beats she would shake them back, revealing her warm eyes and wide smile to him once more.

“Enjoying the party?” she shouted, pushing herself on her tiptoes so he could hear her. When the party started, she had made sure the music was in a normal volume, perfect for talking and dancing, but along the way, people started messing with it, and it was now filling every crevice in the room, pushing more and more bodies to the dance floor, pressing her closer to Jackson.

“It’s really nice, you did good Maggie.” she preened under his compliment, her lips pressing together as she ducked her head.

She had done all of this to impress her boss, that two hours ago she was sure she was completely in love with. Now? She just walked him out of the party, wishing him and his fiancee a lot of happiness (once again, she kicked herself for not knowing he was engaged, she had heard him talk about a Megan before but for some reason she had assumed she was his sister) but in the end she didn’t really care. This is how she should be enjoying the party, with her friends, dancing like she didn’t have a care in the world.

Pressing one of her hands against his neck, Maggie ran her finger through his jaw. “Thanks. You know, I’m surprisingly --”

Shushing her, he stopped her before she got another grand idea, “Cardiothoracic Surgery. Remember that? Your dream since you were a kid, and don’t say it wasn’t, I remember you playing with that Anatomy Jane Doll. Stop getting distracted by these ridiculous projects.”

“Hey!” stepping on his foot, she jokingly pushed him away, “I thought we made a pact not to mention childhood memories in public!”

Rolling his eyes, Jackson tugged her closer again, glad that she came back into his arms without any resistance, her tiny body fitting into his perfectly. “It’s a party, no one can hear us.” he pointed out. “And it’s not even embarrassing.”

The rule had come when Meredith started laughing one day while they were having lunch in Really Old Guy’s room because she remembered Maggie’s terrible zombie poem and mentioned it to Alex and Cristina, who, on one hand feared Maggie because she was their chief resident and could make their lives a living hell, but on the other hand, also thought it was okay to mock her because of their friendship with her sister.

Maggie retaliated with pictures of Meredith’s pink hair phase.

He, then made the mistake of laughing at both of them.

Which, a person should never do. Laughing at two sisters who are always ready to fight? Maggie and Meredith joined forces and started digging up every embarrassing thing he ever did. Pictures of him dressed as Michael Jackson suddenly appeared in Dr. Sloan’s email inbox.

After several more rounds where new allegiances were formed and broken, Bailey chewed them out for being distracted at work and they decided to make a pact to not mention childhood memories around other people.

“It doesn’t matter! It’s not just embarrassing memories, it’s all memories.”

“You just know you would lose.” he said, baiting her.

The moment her eyes flashed with fire, gearing herself up to argue back, her mouth opening slightly, he felt the urge to shut her up with a kiss.

This was new, and at the same time, it felt like nothing had changed at all.

How could he be so dumb and take this long to notice this?

“- I would not!” she stopped dancing, incensed, arguing back with passion, all the while he smiled, enjoying the show and holding himself back from ruining his friendship with his best friend.

He needed to freak out about this for a little while longer before kissing her.

But yeah, he would kiss her, there was no other option for him anymore.  

 

 

The rest of the party they spend around each other, dancing by themselves, earning a few raised eyebrows from fellow doctors who had been assured months ago there was nothing between them (something they did not at all believe), or joining their friends. Shots with Cristina; dancing like idiots with Meredith; laughing with Karev on the porch as he told them some wild tale about his time fighting.

As the party started winding down, they found themselves sitting on the office floor, a passed out Cristina on the couch behind them.

“I know your secret Mr Avery.” stretching languidly, she rests her head on his shoulder, her eyes fluttering closed.

Steeling himself, he started trying to explain himself, “I don’t--”

“You are the best guy in the world.” she mumbled. He relaxes, knowing his secret is still safe, and while the sentiment nice, he had no idea where it came from.

“I sure I am. Why?”

“April. Everyone ignored how sad she looked, that bitchy nurse was treating her horribly and you stepped in. She told me how much she loved dancing with you tonight, you made her so happy. Thank you. It means a lot to me.”

He had forgotten about that. “Of course I did. I know she is your new protege or whatever, but she has been my friend for months. No one treats my friends like shit.”

“As I said, best guy in the world.”

“You are funny.” taking a deep breath, he considered spilling his guts here and now, telling her everything he was feeling, how horrible he felt this past few weeks without her, how much he adored her, how crazy he was to taste her lips, but before he could, he felt her head drop and the a light snore filled the room.

Chuckling, he grabbed a blanket and threw it over them.

This wouldn’t be the first time they slept together, but this would mark the first time he pressed a kiss against her forehead before drifting off.

 

 

Walking into the kitchen, as if summoned by the smell of coffee, Maggie grunted in greeting and accepted the cup Jackson offered her, sipping it slowly, groaning at everything. Her body ached from sleeping on the floor (waking up wrapped in Jackson’s hoodie, though, was surprisingly good, the fabric had been soft under her cheek and the smell made her feel safe), and her feet feel like lead after spending the whole night in strappy heels that she knew she would regret in the morning but she still put it on because she loved how it made her legs look.

“Ugh,” she groaned again, resting her back against the refrigerator, her whole body curved around the cup of coffee.

“You’ve said that already.” Jackson chirped, not looking up from his phone. Typing one final message, he turned it off. “Come on, we’re going out.”

Raising an eyebrow, she glared at him. “Um, no. I’m never leaving this house again. I gotta clean this mess, I probably have makeup smeared all over my place and I slept on my hair.” Pressing his lips together, he smiled at the disheveled sight she made _(but still so heartbreakingly beautiful, so tempting, so kissable)_ , “See! You’re laughing at me. I can’t leave.” she said self consciously, petting her hair down.

“Pity, I hired a cleaning company to come in here and clean things up. Guess I should cancel it than…” he had barely lifted his phone before Maggie shouted no. “ _No?_ ” he asked, tilting his head to the side, a smirk painting his lips. He had been up for a few hours and felt more in control of himself than yesterday, his feelings for Maggie were still big and difficult to get his head around, but at least he had some clarity.

He loved her. Plain and simple.

“No! I mean, you hired them already…  But we should still stay here and make sure they don’t steal anything. Can’t let that precious Avery money go to waste.”

“Your sister is here. And Cristina too. I dragged her to Meredith’s bed when I woke up, Marsh is gonna be very surprised when he wakes up…” better get him used to how the Twisted Sisters worked now before he got a big surprise next time one of them started going through something. “They can watch over them. While we can go to my house, watch a movie and recuperate.”

Maggie considered his proposal for a few seconds, already knowing she would agree, but it was in her nature to overthink things and make plans before deciding anything. “We are stopping by that fancy farmer’s market near your place first. I want some strawberries.”

“As you wish.” Swatting his arm for his cheeky answer, she ran (walked slowly while groaning) up to her room to change into normal clothes, wrapped her head with a scarf and cleaned her face. Thank god she stashed some hair products at his place a few weeks ago, she would probably forget half of them if she tried grabbing them now.

 

 

Twenty minutes of her day, gone to waste!

They had agreed yesterday to meet up for lunch in the cafeteria, but after waiting twenty minutes for the redhead to show, Maggie started paging her and texting her, worried something had happened. April’s name wasn’t on the board and she wasn’t in the ER. And because she is a good caring friend, Maggie ended up spending twenty minutes walking around the hospital in a frenzy searching for her, expecting to find her injured or crying over a patient, but  instead, she found her sitting besides Jackson in one of the gurneys the intern had claimed for themselves, munching on a brownie and hanging on to his every word.

Clearing her throat, she glared at both of them, pleased when April jumped up, going as red as her hair with embarrassment.

Jackson, on the other hand, lazily looked up at her, blue eyes twinkling, absolutely relaxed.

“Maggie! I’m so sorry, I forgot about our lunch. Jackson started talking about –”

Raising a hand to shut her up, Maggie went into Chief Resident mode, her lips pursed and stance rigid as she spoke. “The patients in the surgical floor, do their post-op notes. After you are done, rooms 2456 and 4567 need a central line to get their medications. And room 3456 needs an enema, do that first. If you finish before your shift is done, go to the pit and do sutures.”

“Seriously?” she protested, standing up.

“You are an intern April, that’s your job.” she snapped, annoyed that she was being questioned. Did April not understand how things worked? This was a hierarchy and she was just a baby. “Now get to it, or I’ll have you on scut duty until the end of the week.”

The way April was glaring at her, it was obvious she thought this was payback for forgetting their lunch, and while she had been sad and worried about that, this reaction came from somewhere else, born from feelings she had buried ages ago and flared up every now and then.

“Fine!” grabbing her lab coat, April stalked off, muttering under her breath. Looking after her, Maggie briefly considered chasing after her to apologize but she was too angry for that right now.

“Bit harsh, don’t you think so Maggie?” Jackson asked pushing himself up. “That’s a lot of work for one person.”

“No, no it’s not. I have been going easy on April, giving her more time to focus on surgeries because I thought she was aimless, but I can’t give her special treatment forever.” crossing her arms over her chest, annoyed that another intern (Jackson, her best friend) was questioning her decision. “Couldn’t you do that much work in one shift?”

He considered her question for a second before replying, “I could, but that’s not the point.” blue eyes met brown in a fierce battle, neither side willing to soften. “Is that what you had planned for her for today?” he asked, as always seeing through her. “Why are you acting this way?”

“No, but it should have been! And I don’t need to explain my choices to you Jackson, you are an intern and I am your Chief Resident.”  

“No, I am your best friend and I get to call out out on your bullshit. And this? Right here, this is bullshit Maggie.” she could try and intimidate him with titles and the fact she was technically his boss, but he wasn’t backing down, not when he saw her acting wrong. Sure, can be  unreasonable sometimes (not that he would ever tell her that), but she is not vindictive or mean. “I don’t think anyone is complaining about the way you handle April. All the attendings are pleased with her improvement.”

“Are you sure? Because it doesn’t take much for them to turn on me. But you wouldn’t know anything about this, because you are an Avery and people always find something to compliment you on, even when you did nothing.” his face closes, his whole body tensing at her words, he feels like he was just stabbed in the chest -- he has always feared special treatment because of his last name, and Maggie knows this, to hear _her_ throw those words at his face… “You know, me and Mer walk into a place and she says “Meredith Grey” and people immediately ask if she is Ellis’s daughter, when I introduce myself, people make a bad joke about the fifty shades book.”

When she finishes, she looks up at Jackson, expecting him to argue back immediately but he is staring at a point beyond her shoulder, his eyes hardened beyond recognition. “I see. Well, I am an intern aren’t I? I guess I need to get back to work.”

“Yeah, you better.”  she replied immediately, triumphant. But a second later she frowned, losing her fire, not understanding what happened.

 

 

“Oh, it’s you.”  raising her hand from her hands, Maggie raises an eyebrow at the disappointed tone. She has been sitting in a gurney, trying to understand what went wrong in her fight with Jackson. Seeing April here reminds her that of their fight earlier, god she hasn’t even had the time to process what happened, but here is April, fidgeting like a child with a secret.

Standing up from the gurney, Maggie adjusts her scrubs, not looking at April, trying to ignore the twisted feeling in her gut -- guilt. Guilt for overreacting and giving an April a dressing down she did not deserve, guilt for hating April so much at that moment that she let her emotions dictate how she treated an intern. Guilt that she didn’t feel guilty enough about it.

“ _Oh it’s me?_ ” she replied with a little bit of bite.

“You know, I was going to be angry with you for a little while longer because of how you behaved earlier, but I need to talk to you about something.” April said, her sour expression turning giddy as she grabbed Maggie’s hands, practically bouncing up and down  with excitement. “Oh, Maggie! You were right, we were right about everything. I needed to push myself more, and Matthew? He was cute, but I now know that I was settling. Did you see how he was looking at me when you got here? And he is so handsome, his eyes! They are so blue! So tell me, what do you think?”

Shocked, Maggie sputtered, unable to form a sentence. Was April telling her that she was in love with Jackson?

“You told me wonderful things were going to happen to me, that I would find a relationship that made me better, made me grow. And I think I found it. He was so incredible in your party, and he is such a great dancer.” the blush that stained April’s cheeks told Maggie that April was already thinking of other types of dancing. “He talked to me after our fight, wanted to make sure I was alright. He was so pissed off in my behalf, I felt like a heroine from a romantic comedy.”

“But he is Jackson!” she said, without really knowing what her words meant -- _he is Jackson, a great guy, caring, committed, April could not do better than him._ So why did the thought of the two of them together made her want to gag?

“I know! I didn’t think he would be interested in me either, but he danced with me. You have known him all your life, know him better than anyone. Do you think we can work out?” glad that she had worn her hair down today, Maggie ducked her head, hiding her expression from April -- hopeful, innocent April whose words were breaking her heart. “And your support will mean the world to _us._ You are his best friend, and you know, I consider you to be my best friend as well.”

“We? Us?” she choked out. “Are the two of you together already?”

“No, not yet. But we did make plans for this week, granted it’s just for studying, but it’s going to be just the two of us. And we always partner up for everything. I think he understands that I don’t have a lot of experience and is taking things slowly.” laughing, April squeezed Maggie’s hands, “I would never have thought of him if it weren’t for you. Every time I went by your place, he was there. I got to know him so much better, he smiles a lot when he isn’t in the hospital. He was always so nice to me, he even flirted a little bit I think.”

Taking a deep breath, Maggie raised her head, but still failed to meet April’s eyes. “Jackson is not the type of guy to play with a girl’s feelings.”

“Thank you so much Maggie!” Maggie let herself be hugged, petting April’s back awkwardly. “You know I was so nervous--”

Interrupting her, Maggie desentagled herself and stood up. “I gotta go. We need milk. I promised Mer I would get milk before I went home.”

“Wait, Maggie.” waving goodbye, Maggie practically ran out of the hospital, making a quick excuse to Dr. Bailey about having a fever, the frenzied glazed look in her eyes was enough to convince the older doctor that there was something wrong with her.

Staring at the wheel of her car, Maggie mumbled. “I wish to god I had never met her.”

 

 

Hearing curses coming from outside of the house, Meredith opens the door slowly, her eyes widening when she sees her sister cursing out her purse and crying in the middle of the porch.

“Maggie? What’s wrong?” she barely has a moment to open her arms before Maggie collapses into her. “Mag?”

She tries getting her sister to explain a few more times, but all she does is cry harder, her body shaking from the sobs.

“It’s okay, it’s going to be okay.” she promises kissing her temple, “You’re gonna be okay Maggie.” ushering her sister into the house, she took them upstairs, shooting a quick text to Amelia to join them with ice cream, lots of ice cream.

She was going to kill Jackson, she isn’t sure what he did, but for Maggie to be falling apart like this? Meredith knows he is somehow involved.

 

 

“This is the seventh time you groaned in five minutes Avery, spit it out.” Glaring at Cristina, Jackson ignored her request, stubbornly keeping his mouth shut.

“If you aren’t going to talk about it, you can’t groan anymore. I can’t take your drama anymore, I got enough of that with Mer. Spit it out or shut up forever, those are your two choices.” Her tone was sharp, it was always sharp, Cristina Yang was not someone anyone would call kind, but Jackson knew her well enough to know what while she would prefer to never know anything personal about anyone ever, that she cared about the other interns in her own special twisted way and this way her way of asking him to share.

“I had a fight with Maggie yesterday.” He mumbled from the bottom bunk, glad the on call rooms had bunk beds so she wouldn’t see the pout gracing his lips.

That didn’t stop her from laughing at him.  “Okay, so go apologize to your girlfriend. You are rich aren’t you? Buy her an island or something.  And please do it fast, she is usually annoying but good to work with. Today she has just been sad, and depressing. And Cardio isn’t sad or depressing, it’s hardcore.”

“She is not my girlfriend.” The reply wasn’t as immediate as it usually was, it was slow, as if the words were painful to utter.

Scoffing, Cristina only laughed when she felt a kick at her back.

“Could’ve fooled me. The way the two of you stare at each other all day, the way she was crying last night.”

“She was crying?” he asked, his heart constricting.

“Seriously, you follow her with your magnetic blue eyes all the time, I’m not surprised she doesn’t have a hole in her ass the way you stare at it.”

“Yang!” he exclaimed, shutting her up, “What do you mean Maggie was crying last night?” he considered defending himself from the accusation he stared at her ass but he knew it would be a losing war. Ever since he accepted his feelings for Maggie, he started realizing how most of their interactions toed the edge of platonic. His hand always strayed to her back when they were talking together, he thought she was the most attractive woman in the hospital, the unoccupied room in hers and Mer’s place was his unofficial room, and she had a stash of hair products in his apartment – and considering how expensive those things were -- and for such a small amount, dating her was the next logical step in the progression of their relationship, but after he walked away from her last night, he felt like they were back in square one.

He groaned again.

“Yeah, I went to Mer’s last night to watch their mom’s surgical tapes, that woman was a genius.” _She was a bitch_ , Jackson mumbled, “Anyways, when I got there, I found both of them and Shepherd’s sister snuggling in bed, eating ice cream and I heard your name thrown around a few times. By the way, little Shepherd is an incredible surgeon, definetly an upgrade.” personally, Jackson found them both very talented surgeons, maybe Derek had a little more experience under his belt, but after Derek’s McWife debacle he was glad to see the man leave.

“Can you focus, please?” he begged standing up, pushing himself up so he could look at her. “What were they saying?”

“I don’t know.” She replied immediately but under Jackson’s pleading stare she sighed and continued, “She thinks your friendship is ruined and that you hate her now.”

“Hate her? She thinks I hate her? How could she think that!”

“I know right? She is a genius but she can’t see that you are in love with her. Also, be careful, Shepherd and Grey might kill you. They were plotting your death when I left.”

He has no doubt Meredith would kill him, he knows her well enough to know what she is capable of.

“And come on, did you have to fight this week? Riggs is taking a few days off because his fiancee is on leave, total hottie by the way, another redhead… I guess the man in this hospital have a type. Anyways, if your girlfriend wasn’t so pissed I think she would have allowed me to throw that last stitch in surgery today. I could have gotten it. Instead, she chewed me out and kicked me out of the OR.”

“Riggs is married?” this couldn’t be happening, weren’t he and Maggie becoming a thing? She liked him so much, she threw a whole freaking party for him, she would be devastated by these news and they were fighting, he couldn’t console her.

“ _Engaged_ , he has a fiancee not a wife.” The silence stretched on for a few minutes before she added  “you can go to her you know, even if you are fighting.”

“Avery?” rolling, she ducked her head to look at the bottom bunk to chew him out some more but he had already left. “Finally, now I can get some sleep.”

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have no excuse except that I haven't been able to concentrate on this or any fic. Enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Read and review? Love me pls

“You never texted me back last night, is everything okay?” raising her chin, Meredith kissed Nick briefly, smiling apologetically as she pulled away. Checking to see if she still had some time before her shift started, she grabbed his hand and tugged him to an on call room, rolling her eyes at how quickly his concerned expression melted away to something more interested.  
“Don’t start getting ideas, I just don’t want anyone to overhear us.” still, she didn’t exactly protest as he crowded her against the door, locking the door with one hand as the other started drawing small circles on the skin between her scrub top and pants.  
“No ideas here, I am just here to listen. So, what happened?” her eyes fluttered closed when he started kissing her neck, distracting her from what she was about to say. Pressing her hand against his neck, she put a little pressure on it, keeping him in that wonderful spot he discovered a week ago when they were in his place. “Nothing to share?” she could practically feel his smirk against her skin.  
Slapping his chest, she pushed him away, her expression playfully angry as she circled the room, keeping him at a distance. “Sit down on the bed and stay there.” she ordered, sitting down in one of the chairs -- she would have preferred to lean against the wall but it was clear that position would not be safe.  
With mock-solemnity, he saluted her and sat down on the bed, smiling innocently at her. “Yes Ma’am. You don’t need to tell me if you don’t want to.”  
“No, I do. You just distracted me.” ignoring his pleased look, she launches into her story.

_-12 hours earlier -_

The sisters are lying in bed together, Meredith quiet as she waits for Maggie to compose herself and explain what happened. In one moment of weakness, still jealous of her sister’s preferential treatment towards April in the past few weeks she offers to call her, but the violent way Maggie reacts to her name gives Meredith another clue of what happened.  
Amelia eventually shows up, carrying ice cream and spoons and the ability to discuss feelings that Meredith doesn’t have.  
“You’re going to have to talk eventually, or I will have no choice but to go around killing people. April will be first,” Maggie smiles a little at that, “then Riggs because I can’t believe he has a fiancee that none of us knew about,” this one makes her laugh a little bit, “and I guess I’ll have to kill Nick because he will notice that I’ve gone on a killing spree and I don’t think he is ready to be ride or die yet,” a cute little snort is the answer she gets for this one, “who else, well, I guess Jackson because he will notice as well and --” the way Maggie stiffens in her arms lets Meredith know she hit the jackpot, “-- and I think he deserves to die.” sharing a look with Amelia, she nods, letting the brunette take the lead.  
“Maggie, do you want to tell us what happened?” turning around in bed, Maggie buries her face in one of the pillows and starts mumbling something. “Could you repeat that? I didn’t catch that, did you catch that?”  
“I didn’t. Maggie, can you lift your face please?” Meredith asks softly, but once again the answer is mumbled into the pillow.  
Without warning, Maggie suddenly jumps up and sits on the middle of the bed, almost throwing the other women out of the bed, her tear stained face angry and resolute. “Let me tell you what happened. Seriously, let me tell you what happened, because you won’t believe it. First, April is in love with Jackson.”  
“I believe it.” Amelia says, adjusting herself against the headboard, head tilted to the side as she drums her fingers against the bedside table. “He is very hot for an intern and he is nice to her. And let’s be honest, besides you Maggie, no one else in the hospital has the patience to be nice to her.”  
“Okay, well!” Maggie starts against, her expression even more maniac, “she thinks they are dating and I’m not sure if they are or not.”  
“I don’t see why that’s a problem. I mean, I might have to cut ties with Jackson because I don’t want him bringing her to Christmas dinner but if he wants to date her, we can’t stop him.” Meredith drawls, resting her head on Amelia’s thigh. “But I saw them today and that was not the vibe I was getting from them at all. At least not from him.”  
“Well! She thinks they are dating, she told me so herself! After blowing me off to spend time with him! And then he and I had this huge fight, and I-- I said horrible things to him, truly horrible things that he will never forgive me for saying. I ruined our friendship.” she knew how he felt about being the pretty face of the Avery family, his insecurities when it comes to proving himself, and she just threw those words at his face.  
She is supposed to be his best friend, to support him when things get tough and yell at idiots who disrespect them. But today, she was the idiot.  
“Apologize to him. Avery is a reasonable guy, he will accept your apology.” Amelia tried, but Maggie shaked her head and looked at Meredith, pleading with her to understand that there was no turning back, her dramatic side flaring up, clouding her judgement.  
Practical as ever, Meredith shrugged. “Okay, we are no longer friends with them than. What’s next.” the cheeky answer didn’t get her the laughter she was expecting, instead Maggie’s eyes started filling with tears once again. “Ok, no. No, he is still your best friend. And he will forgive you, he is Jackson and you are Maggie, you two are the perfect best friends, he will forgive you.”  
“I don’t want to be his best friend! I’m in love with him.”  
Silence filled the room.  
The thought of anyone else being with Jackson filled her with disgust, one night stands had always annoyed her, but she didn’t dwell much on them, knowing that they didn’t mean anything. But if Jackson started dating someone seriously (and April wasn’t the type to date anyone casually, if they were together, it meant that it was heading somewhere -- somewhere with a white dress and a church bell), it would mean being replaced as the first in his attentions. He wouldn’t be able to stop by for a quick bite or to fix something whenever she asked, they wouldn’t spend afternoons together reading medical journals or novels and teasing each other. He would have someone in his house waiting for him.  
Their relationship would be exposed, vulnerable to the whims of a third party.  
Imagining the two of them together made her want to hurl and curl in bed for the rest of her life.  
He was her Jackson, she was the one who was supposed to kiss him goodnight, hold his hand when things got tough, laugh at his mom’s crazy behavior.  
She fell in love with him years ago, but he was her best friend, part of the little family she and Mer created in the absence of fathers or a mother who gave them attention. A relationship could damage that, so she buried her feelings, lied to herself and everyone about them until she almost started believing he was simply her best friend.  
But April’s confession shattered those illusions, making her confront her feelings.  
“I can’t be his best friend because I am in love with him. And if he is in love with April, I don’t think, I don’t think I can handle seeing him with her. I love him Meredith, I’ve loved him for só long that I don’t know what it’s like to not be in love with him.” she ranted, “I started matchmaking and I began imagining the perfect partner for everyone. Mer, yours was Nick. I set up Dr. Bailey with that sexy anesthesiologist, and Amelia I was going to set you up with that sexy italian OBGYN attending, I mean have you seen her? I know you’ve seen her, I’ve caught you staring at her a million times.. But! That’s not the point, the point is, I never gave Jackson a perfect imaginary partner, because I’ve never been able to imagine him with anyone but me. And now... And now I might lose him.” her voice broke at the end, and immediately she was enveloped by two pairs of arms as she started crying again.  
The door opened a smidge and Cristina poked her head in, obviously wanting to talk to Meredith, but her person nodded and mouthed to come back tomorrow, before going back to talking about how ugly Jackson looked in middle school.  
The rest of the night was spent in this manner, crying fits, romantic monologues about how wonderful Jackson is and long stretches where they dissed him.  
When Maggie left to change into something more comfortable in her room, Amelia asked the question that had been in her mind since Maggie’s confession, actually, what had been in her mind ever since she saw Maggie and Jackson together for the first time.  
“How did she just realize she is in love with him?”  
Meredith, who had watched her little sister and best friend fall in love and pretend for years that that was not the case, could only shrug. “They are both very stubborn people. Maggie probably created a list of reasons to not be in love with Jackson and he probably tried to ignore his feelings and pretend what he felt was friendship. I love them, but they can be quite delusional sometimes.”  
“Do you think he feels the same way right now?” Amelia asked, fearful about the possibility of Jackson actually being with April and the effect this would have on her friend.  
“No, I don’t think so. He was jealous of Maggie spending time with April, and if looks could kill, Riggs would be seven feet under by now. He is in love with her, I just hope he isn’t using April to forget that.”  
Meredith dearly loved both of them, Maggie was the only reason why her mother’s house had any joy. Her annoyance at the screaming baby who kept waking her up in the middle of the night melted away the second her mother told her to take care of her sister and not to wait up because she had a late surgery, that little bundle that gave her a huge headache the day before was now precious to her.  
“Jackson wouldn’t do that, would he?”  
Amelia never got her answer, as Maggie re-entered the room a second later, snuggling in between the two of them, her arm tight around Meredith’s waist.  
Maggie’s head felt heavy from all of the crying, but what truly dragged her down was the heavy heart she was carrying. Her heart belonged to Jackson, truly and completely. To lose him before she really had him, before she had a chance to even kiss him. It was a fate she wouldn’t wish on anyone.

_\- present -_

“Huh.” lying back between Nick’s legs, Meredith tilted her head up, a curious brow lifted.  
“Huh what?” she asked when he didn’t elaborate.  
“That explains Avery’s behavior today, he refused to scrub in on a transplant surgery and when I asked if he was available to come with me to Arizona later today he also declined. Not used to interns saying no to surgeries, you lot are pretty scalpel crazy.” grinning when Meredith slaps his chest, he hugs her closer, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

Jackson had been pacing the hospital for hours, he was working, but he also spent most of his time by the hospital’s entrance, hoping for a glimpse of Maggie. His plan had been to visit her at home, but he got called in early and didn’t have time.  
He hated fighting with Maggie, he hated not being able to talk to her, complain about his day or share a funny meme he saw on his feed. He might not be okay with everything that was said yesterday (correction: he was definetly still angry about some of the things that were said), but in the end, he had to decide -- what mattered more? His pride or his best friend, correction -- the woman he loves. And it was Maggie, Maggie won every time. He was going to talk to her, apologize, and hope she apologized back. If not, he would talk to her later about it. But the absence of her hurt a lot more than anything else.  
Seeing a familiar flame of red hair, he jogged over to April, speaking before she could get a sound out.  
“Have you seen Maggie this morning?” he asked, missing the way her face dropped. You see, April had been hoping he was going to ask her out now, after all, he had sided with her over his best friend, they were closer than ever, so it would be the perfect time for them to start going out. And she checked her calender -- if they started dating now, they would probably have a June wedding. And they would have time to plan the wedding and get the church she had always dreamed of getting married in.  
“Maggie, no, I haven’t. Um, Jackson could I--” he interrupted her, saying he would find her later and this time jogged over to Bailey, who cut him off before he could even ask her a question.  
“Do I look like a cruise director?”  
“No?”  
“Was that a question Avery?” Bailey asked turning around to face him, both eyebrows raised and a smirk teasing her lips.  
“No? No, ma’am.” he said, throwing in the little bit of charm that usually made women melt.  
It had no effect on Miranda Bailey. “But--”  
Her features softened slightly and she replied to his unspoken question. “She is in the skills lab.”  
He didn’t question how she knew who he was looking for. He may be new at the hospital, but he already knew this simple truth -- Bailey knows everything and she is always right.  
Beaming, he pressed a kiss against her forehead, ignoring her protestations and ran to the skills lab, not caring that Bailey was yelling at him to slow down and not even realizing that April had tried to touch him on the arm as he passed by her.

 

They stared at each other in silent, breathing each other in, their faces immediately softening, smiles gracing their lips. There was a lot to be spoken, but in that look the two of them shared the most important things -- forgiveness, longing, and dare I say it, love.  
Maggie, seeing no resistance, wrapped her arms around him, her lips pressed against his neck as she shuddered in his arms, crying about their fight, the feelings she knew he didn’t return and all the things she kept bottled up.  
“Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay.” he murmured, his hand running up and down her back in circular motions.  
“No, no, no.” she protested pushing him away, brushing the tears away from her face angrily. “You don’t get to comfort me.”  
“Maggie..” he stared at her, confusion coloring his blue eyes.  
Holding a hand up, she started walking up and down the room. After doing the course three times she turned to face him. “I was the one who hurt you! I should be the one comforting you, I should be on my knees begging for your forgiveness.”  
Stepping closer to her, he put his hands on her shoulders, smiling kindly at her. “I forgive you.”  
But his words, instead of soothing her only angered her more. “No! Why would you? I knew what I was doing, I hurt you Jackson. I hurt you, and you didn’t deserve it.”  
Amused by her antics, he only tugged her closer, laughing at her. “Okay. I still forgive you. But do you forgive me?”  
“Yes, of course, but--”  
“Good.”  
“-This argument isn’t over Jackson Avery!” she continued, unbothered by his interruption, “how can you be so--” waving her hand in front of her, pointing to his whole body, “you should be angry! Thunderous! I deserve that, I got myself prepared for that.”  
“Oh, I see. Would you prefer if I enter the room again and start yelling at you and saying you are the worst friend in the world?”  
She actually considered this for a second before shaking her head. “No, I don’t want that either.”  
“Then I won’t.” she was really something else his Maggie, how did he take so long to realize he was in love with her? He would need to thank Riggs for making him aware of his feelings. Ice ran through his veins às he remembered why he had been so frantic to find her yesterday, he had to tell her about Riggs being engaged and break her heart in the process.  
Maggie felt Jackson stiffen, looking up at him, she was surprised to find that his face was no longer warm and open, instead guarded and fearful.  
“What’s wrong?”  
“Um, Maggie, maybe you should sit down.” he suggested pulling up a chair for her.


End file.
